My first week

Well, my first official week as a stay at home mommy is coming to an end. It still has not sunk yet that I don't have my job with the city anymore. If you didn't know, I worked in the 9-1-1 center for over 5 years. I LOVED working there... not always the folks or the situations at work but hey, that's par for any job any where! With the city, I worked 12 hour shifts of days, nights, weekends, and holidays. I also had paid vacations, sick time, lunch breaks, benefits, wonderful co-workers, and the always changing never the same day at work. You never knew what was going to be going on when you answered a phone line. Above all of that though, I forged some of the best friendships anyone could ever ask for with some of the people I worked with... and them, I surely will miss seeing every day.

This week, on my first week at home... well, I have been puked on (several times and I almost puke myself every time!) pooped on, peed on, spit on, drooled on, and slept on... I traded in my career for a new one and love every ounce of it... of her! Chayse is exhausting and rewarding all in one. It is odd... I am home all the time and still, I stay so busy!! I am up several times a night giving her back her paci, I have learned that I really can not sing a lick (she never complains-just laughs!) I try to pick up around the house when she naps, I am lucky if the laundry gets folded before it wrinkles... let alone put in a drawer... life is just so different and I would not trade it for a thing! Nathan has been great and is very supportive of me. He helps with so many things but as many of you know, he is taking classes again so he spends a lot of time studying, for which I am so proud of him. He has his days where he gets frustrated with school and I do my best to cheer him on. Why wouldn't I? He has been doing the same for me for 3 1/2 months with Chayse... he cheers me on when I am frustrated and he keeps me grounded. I am sure if you looked into a window of our house, there are times where you too would laugh... it gets to be kinda funny around here some days. Picture this because this really happens... I am making a made dash through the house to the shower with Chayse, she has puked and is covered in it, I am covered in it to the point it is in my hair, down my shirt and in my bra (YUCK) and here comes Nathan following me. He has on his face a grin that says "Man, I am glad that was you she did that to and not me"! He also has with him towel so he is ready to take her when I pass her out of the shower. Welcome to parenthood! Man, this is the stuff that dreams are made of and this is a dream that I hope I never wake from.

Chayse's first coasters

I ventured on a new journey... I started an Etsy store (that's what the link is over to the right). It is an online place where you can buy handmade items. I promise I will not be one to push stuff on anyone but I thought that this was too stinking cute not to share... Chayse was outside with me when I was working on this so, this is "her first" set of coasters! We call them the Sassy Santa Coasters! Aren't they a trip!

Sunday's are for smiles!

My boxer

I could not pass up the chance to post this picture of my little boxing girl! Chayse has recently learned that she has a mouth... and normally, that is not a problem. When she is sleepy, she likes her hands to go in it! I honestly think that she would be a thumb sucker if we "let" her. We are really trying to keep her on the paci because that is easier to throw away than a finger but sometimes, like in this picture, when there is no paci to be seen, a clean pair of socks will do the trick! I know they say that you can not really do anything to keep a child from sucking their fingers but hey, what's the harm in trying!!!

Etsy

Have any of you ever heard of Etsy? If you have, do you have a shop or a favorite place you like to shop at? I learned about Etsy by talking to my friend Mindy. It is an online store sponsored by Ebay but everything that is on Etsy is either handmade or is something you can use to make a handmade item. There are hundreds of stores in the Etsy world. It is neat just to go surf around at all the stuff out there. I added the link to Etsy over to the right.... you can get to the main Etsy home page by clicking on the bottom links or you can link right into my "store". Mindy told me before I ever looked to be careful because it is addictive... she was right!

3

Seriously? Three? Have we really been married three year? Seems that the pages of time have passed by so quickly and in a split second, so much time has passed. When I think back on the last four August 13th’s, they are all so different. This anniversary is by far very different from the last two we have had! The first August 13 was our wedding day. It was such a blur but we had so much fun!! On the second one, our first anniversary, we were in such a dark place. It is a place no newlyweds should be in. Our first year proved to be the most trying year for us. We lost so much that first year. Early into our marriage, 6 weeks married to be exact, I found myself 4 weeks pregnant. 12 weeks into the pregnancy, we were forced to deal with the complications of a molar pregnancy. 6 weeks later, I found myself unexpectedly pregnant again, this time with Hope Noelle. By the time August rolled around for our one year mark, Hope had passed away as well as my father, and Nathan’s grandmother.
During our second year we found ourselves unexpectedly pregnant, again, during the Christmas holidays. Neither of us was ready for another pregnancy so it took several days to wrap the minds around the baby idea again. By the first week of January, I knew I was having problems again and sure enough, I had a tubal pregnancy. Short of throwing in the towel on children, Nathan and I were done with babies. We had suffered so many losses in the first 18 months of marriage that we were ready to just be us.
But God had different plans. Our second anniversary found us sick… I was pregnant again, this time with Chayse. It became on ongoing joke around here… anytime I would say guess what, it was always answered with are you pregnant again. We were thrilled and scared, trying to trust that God really did know what he was doing. The following months I lived with this level of fear that I wouldn't wish on anyone. But my husband, my friend, he never once doubted anything about Chayse.
This year, our third anniversary found us with a new baby and a new level of happiness that I don’t think either of us really knew existed. Nathan and I have been around the United States and seen lots of places….Las Vegas, New York, Disney, St. Louis, and our beloved Key West. The pictures from these trips are scattered around our home but they don’t tell the underlying story of the things we have been through and how far we've come. I won't lie and tell you our journey has been easy. The last three years have been some of the toughest and most trying years of our lives. What I cannot forget though, is that I have also had some of the happiest moments in my life and some of the best experiences in life. I became a wife, I brought two precious children into this world, and I have enjoyed the unconditional love and friendship of some of the greatest people I have ever known. I have been blessed to be able to experience a love that I didn't know existed...first from my husband and secondly from my children. Whoever said marriage is not easy was right, but it is worth every ounce of laughter, tears, smiles, and memories that come out of it.

As we find ourselves at the start of year four, we find our life changing once again. We have thought hard and prayed about it for a while now and we have decided that I am not going to go back to work. I know this will be an adjustment for us but I also know that it will be worth it. Nathan is 100% behind my staying home with Chayse. I am so blessed that I have his support in this journey. I am truly blessed beyond words. Thank you Lord, for this wonderful family, and thank you Nathan, for being such a wonderful husband and a wonderful father. I love you.

Pine Knoll Shores

One of the perks of living in N.C. is that we are just a drive from the coast and just a drive from the mountains. So today, we went coastal! Nathan was at work so Chayse and I headed to the coast for a girls day with the Ryan's. This was Chayse's her third trip to the coast! We went to check on the house and while we were there, we went to the aquarium. North Carolina has been renovating all of the aquariums and this was the first time I have been to the Pine Knoll Shores one since they did the remodel. It was so much bigger than the old one! Chayse was very stimulated with all of the fish swimming around, the colors, the kids running all over... when we left, she was asleep before we even got off of the island! While I know she won't remember the trip, I know that it does wonders for her development! Yes, I really was going to try and get a picture with her head in the jaws of this beast but I started laughing so hard the I wasn't sure I could hold her still enough to keep her from moving and hitting her head on these teeth! So we just took a normal picture instead!

Doctor Days Again!

We struck out this morning for another adventure to the doctors office. When we went today, we went to the "well side" instead of the "sick side" which was a nice change! All of the lab results are back in and it looks like Chayse is fit as a fiddle! All of her X-Rays, cultures, blood work... everything looks normal. There is no sign of infection so the fever is still a mystery. The new thought on her goes something like this... When the fevers started, Chayse was not teething... she had a virus. Nothing more, nothing less. Chayse's body temperature will still rise sometimes but she is not breaking 101.00 anymore!! Hooray!!! She is no longer taking antibiotics and we are not slated to go back to see the doctor until her 4 month check up.

As frustrating as all of this has been, all things considered, this was such a minor hiccup in the life of Chayse. Nathan and I are well aware of just how VERY VERY blessed we are to have a healthy baby! We well know how easily people find themselves in a different situation with a sick child. When people dream about their children, usually they see trucks, sandboxes, pig tails, popsicles, cars, graduation... so many wonderful things! People don't dream about the medical units, surgeons, I.V.'s, medications, sometimes even funerals that come with a sick child. I read my last post and it almost sounded like I was complaining about taking her to the doctors office. I really wasn't. I was complaining that I felt it was an ongoing problem that took a while to finally be addressed. I would take that child to the doctors office everyday if it kept her healthy. I remember one appointment that I was at to meet with a heart surgeon about Hope. I was sitting there in the waiting room at Duke Children's Hospital watching all of these children around me. So many children with so many different illnesses. Just across the room at the check out desk, there was a lady checking out with her new, perfect, baby boy and she was complaining about having a baby. Her words were "I am 43 years old and single. I passed this point of my life a long time ago. I didn't want to have a baby and now, because of a new position in the bed, here he is." I was SPEECHLESS! I wanted to scream, look around woman! Don't you know how blessed you are!?! I fear that there are many parents in this world who don't understand what a blessing and a miracle a child is. I pray that if you have children and are reading this, you give a prayer of thanksgiving today.

3 months...

Well, I am a few days late on the three month post but things have been hectic. Chayse had a another bout of the fever issues so we have been back to the doctors office again, and again, and again. FINALLY, today, they sent us out to have some test done and have said that she IS NOT teething after all! Her latest fevers are too high to be teething. Anyhow, it will be several days before all of the cultures are done growing but so far, we do know she has an infection somewhere in her tiny body. That said, she is on antibiotics for the first time. Today Chayse had lots of firsts.... first needle in her arm, first time in an X-Ray room/machine, first time having a catheter (which she hated!) but at least we are going in the right direction! I counted today and not counting the three days when she was born and saw doctors in the nursery, Chayse has had 11 doctor visits and she is not even 14 weeks old! But like I said, at least now we are moving in the right direction!

Chaye is growing like a weed, sick and all! She is 13 pounds now and has rolled over twice from her front to her back. I am still not sure she really understands what she is doing, let alone how she is doing it but, she does it! She is quite the jabber jaws when she wants to be! It is TOOOO funny riding in the car with her because she just talks away! The handle bar to her carrier has a cow and a pig attached to it... they are the little Velcro ones that you use on ankles and hands of infants... Anyhow, she is very partial to Mr. Moo (the cow). She knows that the pink pig is there as well but the cow is her main man. She just cracks me up with her endless chatter talking to him. I never hear him talk back but he must because she just loves him! I guess there could be worse things than my baby being in love with Mr. Moo!